Part-time Hostess, part-time plumber

Last May, I applied for and obtained a job as a part-time hostess. My job description is pretty basic. I greet the customers, I seat the customers, I wish the customers good day when they leave. There are some side work things, like wiping down menus and taking out trash and keeping the bathrooms stocked.

But what hostesses don't tell you is that they also usually get stuck on toilet duty. That is, unclogging and generally cleaning up toilet-related messes.

At my place of employment, we have three toilets in the women's bathroom. Let's think of them as children. The first one is well-behaved and has never gotten into trouble in the time I have made its acquaintance. The second one is a little bit of a problem child. It has flushing issues in general, so if there's even a little bit of a backup, it gets really nervous and needs the warm suctioned embrace of a plunger to return it to its normal state. The third one, however, is literally the worst rebel toilet child in the history of plumbage. Nearly every time I work, it is either clogged or overflowing, and usually it's both.

This isn't always the toilet's fault though. It's half toilet issues, half user error. And although I have become pretty handy with a plunger, a squeegee, and a mop, I wanted to share this message with the world. Are you ready? Here it is:

YOU CAN FLUSH MORE THAN ONCE.

If there is ever a point during your bathroom visit where you think, "Wow, that sure is a lot of toilet paper that I've used," that is the time to employ your first flush. Or, if you have emitted a large amount of waste such that even without any toilet paper, the bowl is looking pretty packed, flush away my children. This is called a courtesy flush. You should use it frequently and without hesitation to save your poor hostess from plunging a toilet FOUR TIMES and overflowing it FOUR TIMES in one shift because you can't take the time to reach back and push the damn lever. 

Yes, I am pretty professional at squeegeeing a whole lot of water into a tiny little drain, and yes, I can usually unclog a toilet with one mere round of plunging, but just because I possess these talents does not mean I enjoy them. 

Flush. Just, flush.