Celebrity Hit List

Hit as in, I'd hit that. Like in a sexual way. Ahem. Good. Here it is:

1. Bradley Cooper.

Oh Bradley. You are SO SEXUALLY ATTRACTIVE. Have you seen you?? Like, it's real good. I just want to touch your scruffy mcscruff beard and love your hot bod.

2. Matt Damon.

I have loved you for so long it's insane. You definitely hold the record for longest Hollywood crush. Plus, you're a family man (it's OK, I won't tell your wife and kids, shhhh).

3. Katy Perry.

I mean, really. You are good at singing and playing guitar and writing songs and also our boobs are the same size. Match made in heaven!

4. Ke$ha.

Ooo girl. Girl. You mah girl, girl. Thank you for being that slutty white girl rapper that we never knew we wanted. But now we do. I do. I want you.

5. Will Ferrel.

Dude, for real. Funny always wins. When people ask what traits you're looking for in a partner, people are always like, "Trust!" or "Honesty!" or "Kindness!" Wrong. Hilarity. If you're not funny, I don't want to date you. And you, sir William, you make me giggle so hard. I don't care that you're as old as my dad and have terrifying chest hair. I'm DTF.

6. Neil Patrick Harris.

I know, I know, you're gay. But you're also super hot. And REALLY good at singing. So....you may have me.

7. Dane Cook.

I don't care what anyone says. I think you're hilarious and awesome. And I love you. What? Who said that?

8. Chester Bennington.

Literally, dude, you could just scream for a while and I would be happy. Hothothothothot. And actually, let's throw Adam Levine in there and have an excellent musical experience....if you know what I mean.

9. Dude who plays Kit in American Horror Story Asylum.

What is this man's name? I forget. And I don't feel like googling it. Ok fine, I will. Evan Peters. Happy?  He. Is. So. Attractive. I'm just done. Roommates and I sit rapt with attention whenever he is on screen in Asylum. To much sexy.

Agree? Have someone to add? Tell meh!